Living Out My Calling

Something happened this past week that I must share with you.  I decided it was time to clean out old, expired medications.  I started going through my cupboards thinking it would be a quick, easy task.  I was wrong!  It took me quite a bit of time.

And I had no idea of the emotional impact that was coming.

As I went through various medications, I thought of what they were for.  Bottle after bottle, package after package reminded me of what I've been through in recent years in battling cancer.  With each medication I remembered the horrible condition I had battled.  It was actually a bit shocking when I realized the combined impact of what my body had gone through.  I could almost "feel" what I had previously experienced.

And then, something else - something very wonderful happened.  It hit me how wonderfully God had brought me through all that.....literally brought me back from the edge of death in a few instances.  Tears came and rejoicing filled my heart.  God has touched and healed me over and over again in recent years.  He has been with me and has saved my life.  I have been walking around with a smile on my face thinking of how grateful I am for His goodness and healing.  Wow!

When it happened in little increments it wasn't as noticeable.  But now, cleaning out all these medicines, it was HUGE.  I am so grateful!

I thought back to all the times we prayed for this and that and the other thing......and, at times, it felt like our prayers were bouncing off of heaven and not much was happening.  But now, looking back at all this, I could see a great abundance of answered prayers.  God had met me time and time again.  My heart was strengthened and was just full to overflowing with thankfulness.

I can remember many times when I thanked God in advance for answering prayers.  I'm going to keep doing that because now I can see so clearly how He answered so many prayers.  I'm thanking Him in advance for answering prayers I'm now lifting up to Him.

"If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you."  John 15:7

"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."  Mark 11:24

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."  Philippians 4:6

"This is the confidence we have in approaching God:  that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.  And if we know that He hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of Him."  1 John 5:14,15

"When he calls to me, I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will rescue him and honor him."  Psalm 91:15 

As I searched for what the word says - I was overwhelmed with all God has spoken to us about "hearing" us and responding.  Not one single prayer goes unheard.  He is always listening.  We sometimes get caught up in the "timing" of answered prayer, and we miss it when He answers at a different time or in a different way.

God has been with me.  He has rescued me so many times.  My medicine cleaning out task showed me this so clearly.  Thank you Lord!!!

Two dear friends have asked me questions recently about "calling" - does it change over time?  Do I always feel called?  They're both facing some big issues, so the questions are very important and timely.

As I responded to them, I realized that I have always felt "called" - since I was a little girl of about 5 years of age kneeling by my bed in the middle of the night praying.  I woke my mother up and asked her to pray with me because I had a sense that what God was putting on my heart was important.  I didn't hear an audible voice, but I knew God was speaking to me and calling me - to love and serve Him with my whole heart and to be a missionary.  There weren't any specifics of how/when/where, but the sense of calling was profound.  It has remained with me all my life! 

Through all my 73 years, that calling has not changed at all - but the expression of it, the way it's been lived out, has changed......a number of times.  Just as there are seasons in nature through the year, I think there are seasons in our lives.  It's important to not be stuck in any one "season" because God may have some new things in store for us.  My sense of personal security has been in listening to His voice instructing me in terms of what I should be doing.

I've had a wonderful life of walking with Him, serving Him, and living out my calling.  But it has certainly involved a wide variety of expressions.  I've loved that!  I've felt Him guiding me through the years in terms of what He felt was best for me, season by season.  And there's never been a dull moment!  It has been a rich life of holding His hand and letting Him guide me.

Of course I've been married most of that time - since I was 18.  It was always fascinating to see how God spoke to both Floyd and me when there was some "tweaking" to the season we were in.  It was a sweet confirmation that we were walking in the calling God had for us as a couple.

Another thing that has given me security is knowing that when my heart is to love and serve the Lord, I don't have to be paranoid about making mistakes.  He'll help keep me on the course He has for me.  If I stray a bit, He gently helps me correct my course.  I've always had the sense that He trusts me as I trust Him.  It's been a sweet affirmation in my walk with Him. 

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength."  Deuteronomy 6:5

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith."  Hebrews 12:2

"Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He will do it."  Psalm 37:5

"There are many plans in a man's heart, nevertheless the Lord's counsel - that will stand."  Proverbs 19:21

I've had lots of questions in the season I'm in now, but I've felt Him lovingly guiding me day by day as I walk a new path.  He is continuing to guide me in my calling that began so very many years ago!