I've had something interesting happen in recent weeks. At random times, I've had so many memories floating through my mind. They all center around Floyd. I've realized that there are two categories of memories. Difficult, painful ones of events during his illness. There were many dramatic events over the 5+ years of his time in the hospital. To this day, there are many things I don't understand, but I still feel the pain of them. When these memories come, I take them to the Lord and ask Him to carry the weight of them.
The other category is lovely, warm memories. I've had lots of them pop up too. Memories of family, friends, ministry that are precious and special. I can almost relive the pleasantness of the things that happened through the memory. They bring joy to my heart. When these memories come, I thank the Lord for His goodness to us over many years. He has been so faithful and good to us!
I'm sure these memories coming to me at unexpected times are still part of the grieving process for my heart and mind. I'm discovering that grief doesn't go away. I don't know if it ever will. But it changes, it evolves, and it finds a special place to be tucked in my heart. The razor sharp pain of disappointment and loss is gone. It's now just tender. It's all part of the healing process.
I've found both kinds of memories, even the hard ones, to be a gift. I've seen them as part of the process of grieving, healing, and moving forward. I think the Lord has known when it would be helpful for me to rekindle all the memories. He knows me so well!
"You shall remember all the ways which the Lord your God has led you." Deuteronomy 8:2
"Remember the days of old, consider the years of all generations." Deuteronomy 32:7
"Remember the former things long past. For I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is no one like Me." Isaiah 46:9
God remembers too:
"It is He who remembered us in our low estate, for His steadfast love endures forever." Psalm 136:23
"He knows our frame; God remembers that we are dust." Psalm 103:14
"He remembers His covenant forever, the promise He made, for a thousand generations." Psalm 105:8
There are 352 times in the Bible that tell us to remember. If you count all the variants of the word, then there are 550 times mentioned. We definitely need to keep in mind the things that have happened, to be mindful of them.
Remembering how God has been with us in the ups and downs of life moves us towards Him rather than being fearful of what is to come. I am grateful for all the memories that have been coming back to me - the good ones and the hard ones. God was with me in both the good and the hard. He is the one constant in all my memories. I'm so grateful for His presence in my life!
I was reading something this week. It included this simple statement - "God cares." That simple, two word sentence is so profound. In ways I've learned that God speaks to me, I felt His sweet voice ministering those two words to me personally. My heart was warmed and encouraged by the truth of it. God DOES care! He cares about every single thing in our lives. Nothing is too big or too small for His loving care. What an encouragement that is!
A family member has been very sick. As I prayed for that person, I knew that God cares.
I had a tooth fall out this week. It was a small thing, but it felt traumatic for me. In the moment, I knew God cares.
I heard of a sweet acquaintance, someone much younger than me, who has been diagnosed with ovarian cancer. As my heart ached for her, I knew that God cares for her.
I live with complications from my own cancer. Some things are hard, painful, and impacting. I felt reminded this week that God cares.
In moments when I feel alone and miss Floyd, I sense the comfort of the Spirit - and know that God cares.
I could go on and on. The important thing for me has been being powerfully reminded that GOD CARES. He cares about every detail in our lives. Whatever we are facing. Whatever our need is. Whatever problem, emotion, situation in our lives that we are facing - God cares. He cares lovingly and deeply. We can bring each thing to Him and receive His help.
"Cast all your care upon Him, for He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7
"I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me." Psalm 3:5
"He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart." Psalm 91:4
"Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness the Lord will be my light." Micah 7:8
"For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, 'Do not fear; I will help you.' " Isaiah 41:13
"Look to the Lord and His strength; seek His face always." Psalm 105:4
The Word is full of God's love, help, and care for us. The One who knows every sparrow that falls, and who numbers the hairs of our head - He cares! We serve a wonderful God who cares. I would not be still standing today except for His daily care!
