Carried

With the exception of a few days at home, I have spent most of the last 6 weeks in the hospital.  It’s been an intense time, to say the least.

There are some days I don’t remember much about.  Those are days they tell me that my life was hanging by a thread.  It’s probably just as well that I don’t remember them.

When I think of a time like this - words come to mind: digging deep, pressing in, interceding, wrestling, not giving up.  In my mind’s eye I see myself fighting for my life!

In reality as I look back over this time the words that come to me are very different.  The clear word, in capital letters, is CARRIED!!!  It’s inscribed on my heart and mind.  I didn’t have to fight - I was carried.

I don’t understand all the details.  Was I carried by God?  By the Holy Spirit?  By Angels?  By the prayers of the saints?  By all the above?  I don’t know - I just know I was carried.

To be honest, I didn’t have the strength to wrestle or fight.  But I could lay in His arms of grace and be carried.  I think I am only now becoming fully aware that in my weakness, He carried me.  I somehow sense that the digging deep, the wrestling, the not giving up all happened long ago.  This wasn’t the time for that.  During this time I needed to let Him carry me - and He did.  I’m still relaxing in that!

“Like an eagle that stirs up its nest, that hovers over its young, He spread His wings and caught them, He carried them on His pinions”  Deuteronomy 32:11

“My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.“  Psalm 63:8

“The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”  Deuteronomy 31:8

“ He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust.”  Psalm 103:14

Last Christmas I saw a silly/funny cartoon.  A little baby is laying in a manger of hay.  The baby has a halo around its head.  Standing on each side is a donkey and a cow.  One says to the other - "Dude, there's a baby in the salad."

It's a bit of Christmas humor - but it also makes a big point.  Jesus wasn't born into a cozy, comfy, color co-ordinated nursery.  Mary didn't get to make sweet preparations for the birth of her little baby.  A stable to give birth in, and a manger to lay the baby in weren't what moms would choose.

The king of the universe, the Son of God was born into the lowliest of low conditions.

I love Christmas - everything about it.  I never get tired of any of it.  Christmas this year, however, has been very different.  No shopping.  No decorations.  Not one single Christmas carol.  Not even a Christmas card.

Since Nov. 6, all but a few of my days have been spent in a hospital bed.  I know Christmas is coming in a couple weeks, but I’ve seen no physical evidence of it!

As I was reflecting on this, I realized that nothing has really changed though.  My heart rings with songs of His birth, in my mind’s eye I see the stable “salad,” I see the sky filled with the choirs of angels - but, most of all, my heart SINGS because of His birth!  I’m so grateful that Jesus came.

“And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call His name Jesus; for He shall save His people from their sins.”  Matthew 1:21

Thank you Jesus for coming!