I read an article recently about a father who had lost his teenage daughter in an accident. He walked through tremendous grief. He said one of the things he learned was that in the "rubble of disaster, there were gemstones." I love that. I think I experienced the same thing. In the midst of the grief and suffering of what was happening to Floyd, there were sweet gifts. God was very present day by day. He faithfully ministered grace, healing, and comfort.
I mentioned recently that Floyd and I were very young when we got married. We quickly learned that we had unrealistic expectations of each other.....and because of that, we needed to talk things through as they arose. We talked a lot! The wonderful thing was that it laid a foundation of communication in our marriage. When differences arose, we learned to quickly talk about them and work them out. If we let them just sit - the differences grew and became harder to resolve.
I'm so grateful for that foundation. It helped us learn and grow together over the years. One day in the hospital, standing by Floyd's bed and telling him about something - it hit me. There was nothing left unsaid between us. We had worked through every difficulty, talked about every misunderstanding, and our hearts were clear towards each other. Everything that needed to be said had been said. Oh - I would have loved to hear him tell me one more time that he loved me.....but there was nothing I wished I'd said or done. It was a special "gemstone" to realize that. We hadn't planned it this way, but what a gift it was in that season.
It's also given me an awareness of other relationships - to work things through, talk things through.....and not let things sit. We never know when there won't be another opportunity.
"...bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony." Colossians 3:13,14
"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8
"Encourage one another and build one another up." 1 Thessalonians 5:11
"Do to others as you would have them do to you." Luke 6:31
"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
There are so many verses about relationships and speech. God has sought to guide us, but we have to do the actual work. We have to take the initiative to talk things through when needed.
I've actually thought of a number of "gemstones" during the 5+ years Floyd was in the hospital, but the one I shared above is so special to me. No regrets. Nothing left unsaid. It brought such rest and peace to realize that. Thank you, Lord, for that!
I had my post treatment check up with my doctor this week. Early indications are that the treatment has been successful. How encouraging that was to hear! The treatment will keep working for quite some time, so my prayer is that it will continue to be successful.
This month is special to me because it marks 9 years since I was diagnosed with cancer. The outlook at that time is that "maybe" I would survive 2 years. I'm so grateful that God was in charge of that "maybe." He had other plans. I'm so grateful that He carried me and helped me survive during the years Floyd was sick. We could never have imagined that Floyd's illness and my cancer battle would both be raging at the same time. I have thanked the Lord over and over that He helped me through those hard years.
I have no idea what's ahead - but I know I'm in good hands. I know that God still has plans for me for every day that I'm still alive. I love walking hand in hand with Him, day by day, for whatever He has in store for me. I feel safe and secure knowing God is in control. What a wonderful place to be!
I read about a lady who was bed-ridden for 16 years and only had use of one thumb. With a fork and stick attached to that thumb, she learned to do many things - put on her glasses, feed herself, sip tea through a tube, turn the pages of her Bible, and other chores. She told a friend she had so much to be thankful for.
Contentment to our life circumstances isn't learned in a few hours, but if we're thankful for whatever blessings we have - we can have a rich life of thankfulness. Praising God turns our burdens and trials into blessings.
I've gone through a lot these last years, but God has been with me and blessed me. I'm so grateful for His faithfulness and help day by day. He is so good!
"I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints." Ephesians 1:18
"Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10
"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul." Psalm 143:8
"Though He brings grief, He will show compassion, so great is His unfailing love." Lamentations 3:32
"My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me." Psalm 63:8
In many cancer rooms/wards they have a bell that patients can ring when they are cancer free. I've never rang that bell because I've not been "free" of my cancer. But God has carried me "through" my cancer day by day. In my mind I ring that bell and thank Him daily. He has been so good to me.
