Grief is Personal

My friend of 40+ years, Rita Pretorius, went to be with Jesus a few days ago.  She was a sweet support to me during the years that Floyd was sick.  Her prayers, encouragement, and recruiting others to pray meant so much to me.  She even came to visit me during that time.  She's a "queen of hospitality" in YWAM and will be greatly missed.  I'm glad she's at peace after the last few months of suffering.

I've realized that I'm in a season of life, probably because of my being older, that many friends and relatives are going to be with Jesus.  My heart feels the loss with each one.  I've been learning a lot about grief, and thought I'd share just a few of the things I've learned.

-  Grief is personal.  My grief is not like someone else's.  It's unique to me.  I shouldn't compare my grief to how someone else processes their grief.  I just need to walk out my own journey.

-  There's no set timetable for grief.  It usually takes time - and that's okay.  Sometimes I think it's over, and then it hits again.  Often times a special day or a memory will bring the grief alive in my heart once more.

-  Grief isn't bad.  It isn't something we need to rush through.  Grieving is part of the healing we need.  If we allow our hearts to grieve, it becomes a balm to the loss.

-  There's no right or wrong way to grieve.  It's nothing to be ashamed of.  Grieving doesn't mean we're weak.  It's normal.

There are countless articles and books written about grief.  I've read quite a few.  But the important thing for me has been that I just need to "do grief" my own personal way.....walking with God along the path.  His comfort, His presence, and His counsel has gotten me through.

"Surely He has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows."  Isaiah 53:4

"He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds."  Psalm 147:3

"Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and He will strengthen your heart."  Psalm 27:14

"The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit."  Psalm 34:18

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted."  Matthew 5:4

We don't grieve like those "who have no hope."  It'll be a grand reunion someday when we join together before the throne and worship the Lord!